In light of last week’s awful rioting, carrying an umbrella with a pistol attached to the handle is a bad idea. Can’t expect the police to be in a jolly mood these days. If you’re wondering how this works, don’t fret. It’s basically an umbrella that funnels water down to the pistol on the handle, thereby allowing the holder to squirt passers by. Take it form us: This will get you in trouble.
Just imagine squirting some unsuspecting bloke and royally pissing them off. A fisticuff ensues and you go home with a bloody nose, the pistol/umbrella broken in half. While this is mighty entertaining for kids, it’s a disaster for adults considering how infantilized and emotionally immature most ‘grown ups’ are these days.
The state of modern adulthood aside, further research reveals this umbrella pistol is more of a design project (though not a commissioned design) than a real product. We were actually hard pressed to find a retail price. Oh well, with the likelihood of awful possibilites resulting from a pistol/umbrella in the wrong hands, might as well steer clear from this. If you do happen to be packing a water pistol, it might be good for driving away small feral animals like rabid dogs or zombie squirrels. Better yet go buy a real gun.
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